Saturday, May 10, 2008

You deserve better.

Hey *****,

I owe you an explanation.

We never really had a "talk" about this sort of thing. But roughly six months ago, I got out of a pretty long and serious relationship. It was also, towards the end at least, a pretty bad and unhealthy relationship, and I wasn't in great shape afterwards.

At any rate, I was pretty sure I'd recovered, and was ready to start dating again. But I think your spending the night a couple of weeks ago maybe sorta freaked me out a little, in a way which made me realize that I might not have me shit quite as together as I thought. First time waking up next to someone else, and all that.

I really have been very busy the last couple of weeks, but I've definitely been using that as an excuse. I think I've been trying to figure out where I'm at - if I'm actually ready to start getting involved with anyone. And clearly, I've been more or less avoiding you in the meantime. You deserve better.

It occurs to me that the fact that it's taken me two weeks to even talk about this (and have pretty much been a jackass in the meantime) is a pretty good indication that I'm not ready. Which sucks, because I really do think you're pretty awesome, and I've had a really good time hanging out. But at the moment, I'm surely more trouble than I'm worth. I'm sorry.

1 comment:

washwords said...

this is a great idea. hope you'll come back to it because it's classic. I'll try to think of some meanwhile.